Am I supposed to provide hotel rooms for out of town family at my mother's memeorial service?

My Mom is gravely ill and one of my siblings wants her to flip the bill for in coming family hotel stays when she passes. Some of us live locally (within 45 min) and could have people stay, Mom's house is good sized and her $$ are not unlimited.

Absolutely not.

You could research a few hotels to get prices and make recommendations but don't pay for it. That's crazy.

Why would you be responsible for other people's hotel bills? It is generous to offer to let people stay with you; you are not required to pay them to stay elsewhere, however, regardless of why they are coming. About the only reason I can think of to pay their bills for them is if they work for you and you required them to stay at the hotel. Otherwise, it's their choice to come; family obligations may make them feel "forced", but that doesn't mean they should then force you (or her) to pay for what they feel they should do.

Absolutely not, I wonder if this sibling is also coming only for the reading of the will too. There are family that anyone coming in can stay with and if it is necessary for a hotel they can pay for that themselves. People get very greedy and self centered when it comes to family's deaths, it is a sad fact. There is no reason that a dying woman should have to pay for other people to come and mourn her, that is twisted. Most of her money will have to go to her own funeral and taking care of anything left, it is NOT her responsibility to pay for anything more than that!!

I dont think it is yours or your mums responsibility to foot the hotel bill for your family. It will be a relatives funeral and they should make the effort to attend it no matter what. If they cannot afford to stay in a hotel, then they can take up your offer to stay with someone but you dont have to pay for anything. Its quite rude that they have demanded this.

Sorry to hear about your Mom...

You are not responsible for paying for hotel rooms, but good etiquette is to reserve a few rooms at a couple different hotels, motels, inns so they are available if people need them. If you let the hotels know the circumstances, they will usually reserve the rooms without any deposit, and then release them by a certain date if no one wants them.

I have never heard of such a thing! What is wrong with your sibling??

Talk to all the family living close by and find out how many you can house. Then have one person keep the list and assign lodging. This is what families do: They stay together during difficult times. They don't take money out of Mom's estate for hotel rooms!

Tell your sibling that if he/she would prefer to stay in hotel, he/she can foot the bill. Geeesh!!!

OK so you shouldn't even have to deal with this at this grave Time in your life. It sounds as if your family members should be more sympathetic, and less lazy and book there own damn rooms, and make there own travel arrangements. While you concentrate, being with your mum.

Also them suggesting you pay for it is disgusting, and rude.

No, I dont think its your responsibility at all. At a time like this, I would hope that people respect you and your family enough to not trouble you with hotel bills, and lodging fees. You have a service and reception to plan, as well as getting affairs in order and most of all healing.

you can reserve a block of rooms at a hotel, but the guests pay for them themselves. Or they can come stay with you. Their hotel shouldn't be covered by your gravely ill mother, or yourself for that matter. It is ridiculous to expect someone to pay for your stay at a memorial service.

You are not obligated to pay for some one's hotel room. That's utterly ridiculous; invite her to stay with one of you who is close, and if he/she refuses, it's up to him/her to pay for a hotel.

you know what , this isn't to be rude , because i feel for you right now , but hell no you are not in any way responsible for this , if anything these miserable assed people should be offering financial help in any way they can to your mother , what kind of damn people are they anyway ,

im sorry to be rude but no. they should care enough about your mom to pay for themselves. if there isnt enough room in family houses then they need to pay for a hotel.

definitely not! Your supposed to provide for your mothers funeral service, that's it.

sorry to hear about your mom though!

You are not responsible for the finances of out of town guests. They are not required to attend.

no i think if your sibling really wanted to come then they wouldn't be asking to be compensated for it.

No.